Your attitude matters

I was dropping off my daughter at school this morning.   As she was getting out of the car, I said "Goodbye, have a great day." Her reply nothing.  I then said "I love you!" Her reply nothing. 

I pulled away like... Wow.

Now, I wasn't aware that I did anything specific to make my daughter angry or give her grounds to be rather rude but mornings aren't her favorite and the teenage moods are the real deal.

Most of the time I am able shake off these kind of hurts (or at least put them in the closet for the devil to use later) but as a pulled away this morning from her school, I was kinda sad.  Then I was kinda mad. 

Sad, that her attitude made me feel unimportant or disrespected. Mad that she's somewhat ungrateful and selfish.  I'm not a perfect mother (person) and I'm sure I slammed the door without saying anything to the people in my life.. Often.  But in that moment I realized that your attitude can really effect people... Both positively or negatively.

We're such emotional people.  We go from happy- to- sad -to- angry and back to happy very easily.  We say we're fine when were not and often we slam the door and walk away which speaks louder than a cheap sentimental goodbye.

I know we're not perfect and flawed through our sinfulness, but there are defining moments that we really must dig deeper and ask ourselves... How is my attitude effecting those around me.. cause it really does matters.

Shake, Shake,Shake senora

Every now and then things don't go my way...  Well, it seems like it's more often these days... That things don't go my way.  Between trials, tribulations, set backs, disappointments...  You name it and I'm having it. 

Google music made me a playlist called "shake it off"

At times I feel I'm growing closer to be more like Christ and then I'm kicked down a few pegs.  

It's like the world wants my to be cynical or angry.  Or it wants me to be sad and depressed.

  Either way,  I know that I need to either shake it off or not be shaken.

I found the best way to shake shake shake... Is through songs and scripture.

In 1 Thessalonians 3: Paul knew that the church was going to face many difficulties and trials.  He knew first hand and he sent Timothy to encourage and help them strengthen their faith.

So when you're disappointed, tested or in battlefront... Seek Jesus, stay close to him and ask him to help you Shake it!!

Dead plants

At work lately, I've been feeling like that dead office plant.  You know the one in the corner that is all wilted and dried up.

It's way too easy to feel malnurished  and deflated.  For a plant it's the lack of water and sunshine, for people it's the lack of encouragement and motivation.

I love buying plants.  I love when they are so full and green.  However I'm not great at keeping them that way.  I recently read a check list on how to grow healthy plants.

1. Know you plants.

2. Make sure the containers or pots are big enough.
3. Provide the right amount of sunshine.
4. Water them only as often as needed.
5. Fertilze.
6. Check your plants often.
7. Keep pest away.

Much of that is applied as being a manager...

1. Know your employees.
2. Make sure they are in positions they like and which allow them to grow and flourish.
3.  Encourage and motivate them.
4.  Give them constructive feedback.
5.  Pay them.
6.  Check in with them regularly even if they all seem good.
7. Pull out the weeds around them that hinder and cause them to stop growing.

If more managers recognized they have to be more like a gardener,  I believe people wouldn't wither and burn out.

The problem is most managers don't want to get their hands dirty or put in the work to have healthy beautiful plants (aka workers.)  Or often they decide to start watering and over water through micromanaging.

If you're a manager... Make sure you treat your plants well.

My uncle Larry

Almost 28 years ago, I remember my mom waking us up one morning

to tell us that my uncle Larry died.

I can still remember trying to piece it all together and trying to grasp the whole idea of life and death. My uncle was only 26, and probably the most mild manner person I had known.  I was so confused.

Eventually things unfolded and I found out that my uncle was out 'coon hunting when a juvenile neighbor, named Steve (*not his real name) stabbed my uncle near the heart.  My uncle died on the way to the hospital.

Apparently Steve didn't like my uncle and did things to make his life difficult.  What made things slightly worse was he was the son of a local preacher. 

I never went to the trial and was shielded from most of the conversations.  I remember bits and pieces I saw on the news and the conversations of the adults around me.

Larry was my first funeral.  Everyone was crying and I was just numb looking at him in the casket.  I remember thinking why is he wearing makeup. 

The trial for my uncle didn't serve justice to my family.  Steve's parents hired him a top attorney and he was found not guilty of murder one.  He claimed he was out camping when a hunter started him.  His defense was 'self defense' but everyone knew he did it on purpose.

How does one live with themselves after purposely killing someone... Truth be told Steve eventually killed himself. 

I recall the satisfaction or justification my family spoke of once they heard the new of Steve's death.  It was as if they believed in karma and he got what he deserved.

I've learned much about forgiveness through this experience.  I don't know if my grandparents or father or my other uncle ever really forgive Steve.

We live in a broken world.  Heartache hit us all in different ways and at different times... Jesus knows what it feels like.  He encourages us all to seek forgiveness when our hearts are wounded.

Are there Steve's in your life?  Best way to heal is to forgive. 

What am I doing?

New year's... It's the time of year you say to yourself I'm going to do x, y, z...

This year  it's been a major time of reflection.

I keep asking myself "what am I doing?"

I love being self-aware,  but every now and then I become clueless on what I'm doing any who I am.

I keep going through life thinking I need to check the ALL of the boxes.  Or at least see many as I can.
Get married ☑️ check.  Have kids but ☑️ check. Get a job ☑️ check.  Drive a race car ☑️ check.

Lately I feel like I'm missing something really important.  My propose seems all jumbled and hodge podged.

Time is also against me as it seems I'm running out of it.  It's flying by and I'm aging way too fast.  They say you get to fully enjoy life when you're retired but I'm selfish and I want it now.

Anyone who knows me, knows I'm a "Martha". - 100%
I'm trying to make sure the meal gets prepared, complain I'm the only one making it, and half the time I forget to stop and really enjoy the meal once it's complete.  

Most of the time while I'm already thinking about the next meal before finishing the first. 

I wish I could be a "Mary" or at least be 50/50 Martha/Mary combo.

Maybe my life purpose is really just to stop doing x,y,z... And start listening, sitting and enjoying all the little things.

I'm not sure how to do that and I'm not sure how much it truly enjoy that. But I'm not sure what I'm doing anyway so it's work a try. 

Jumping on the bandwagon

It's FAR too easy to jump on the bandwagon... My son was recently learning about idioms and the bandwagon is a pretty famous one.

In 19 century America, the bandwagon was a wagon that carried a group of musicians. 

People often followed them preceding a parade or some performance.  Since then it's become an effect where people uptake a certain belief, idea, fad, or trend.  It's the individual following or adopting those things mostly because it's present and looked entertaining.

I often find myself caught jumping on and off certain bandwagons.   I'm easily attracted to the songs and tunes of said bandwagon.  Oh that clever devil...

I'm certainly caught between staying in the path Jesus calls us to and the path that the world follows... The one that says I should be, do, have... Be something special, do something grand, and have all the things my heart desires.

Jesus doesn't promise his road is easier... He doesn't promise the worldly be, do, have...  The ones the bandwagons promotes.   But he does promise a reward far greater.. be in Christ, do his work, and get his reward.  Often times his wagon may seem rather dull compared to the worlds.

The worldly bandwagon is on a path that won't bring you true Joy or peace.  It will fade and it will leave you empty when the song is over.