Random Thoughts of a Supersmock

I start a lot of paintings that get pretty far along, and then something happens and they remain unfinished. There's usually a good explanation as to why I don't finish them. It's almost as if I lose interest or lose the desire to keep going. Perhaps I'm just afraid I'll mess it up. There have been plenty of times when I kept painting, only to have things go sideways and ruin it. I find myself saying, "If only I hadn't put that green there." The other, and probably more common, excuse is that I simply become uninspired. I get stuck and just give up. I find myself saying, "This isn't really that good..." So I file it away and tell myself that maybe someday I'll finish it. Often, though, those paintings remain unfinished. It's made me wonder if there are other things in my life that I treat like unfinished paintings. The answer is yes. There are quite a few things I start and then quit somewhere along the way. I probably have 30 st...

As I put in my notice for my job, I knew there was going to be challenges...  Hard goodbyes and missed opportunities. Fears and doubts. Bitterness and resentment. But what I found out through this process was how unimportant I was on some levels, as I was told they wouldn't be filling my job. As my job tasks started getting distributed amongst the remaining team, I was struck with the impression that my job was relevant and unimportant.  I certainly know may not be true but it was a humble reminder. Jesus doesn't want us to make idols and he certainly doesn't want us to be prideful in the things we do or the things we have. For me... a good career, a good title, a nice paycheck are idols. For me... Getting praise and glory from others are idols. When people brush me off so easily, I wonder if I was ever important and why people didn't see my beautiful idols.  Ha. This process is reminding me... In many ways .. it's not about ...