Tuesday, May 19, 2026

Architects vs. Engineers — From a Finance Perspective (and a Mom’s Perspective)

Over the last decade, I’ve worked closely with both architects and engineers - and if you sit where I sit in finance, you start to notice patterns pretty quickly.

They’re both essential - smart, hardworking, and critical to getting a project across the finish line. But they think very differently about value, output, and money.

Architects, in my experience, lead with vision. They care deeply about the design, the experience, how something looks, feels, and comes together. There’s pride in the work - and rightly so. The conversation is often about possibilities, beauty, and pushing the idea further.

Engineers approach things a little differently. They want to know:

Does it work? Is it efficient? What’s the most logical way to get there?

And those differences show up clearly when you bring finance into the picture.

Architects often see cost as something to work around or manage. Engineers tend to build cost into the equation from the beginning. There’s a natural focus on efficiency, optimization, and measurable output.

As someone wired for performance, margins, and accountability, I’ll admit - I naturally gravitate toward the engineering mindset. It aligns closely with how I think about results. But I’m also deeply artistic at my core. I can get completely absorbed in an art project, losing track of time, chasing the details, wanting a painting to come together just right. I still love Picasso’s quote, “Every child is an artist. The problem is remaining one when we grow up.” I’ve held onto that. And because of it, I understand the pull of the creative process, which is exactly why I’ve come to appreciate both sides even more.

Which makes this season of life especially meaningful.

My son is starting his second year at Wake Tech, with hopes of transferring to NC State for Civil Engineering. And in a lot of ways, this path feels like it’s been building for a long time.

When he was two, he wanted to be an architect. I still remember his daycare teacher laughing and telling me she had to Google how to spell “architect” so she could label his self-portrait - because most kids his age were drawing themselves as firefighters or police officers.

By third grade, he had shifted to wanting to be a structural engineer. His teacher smiled during our conference and told me her brother was a structural engineer - and that most third graders don’t even know what an engineer is, let alone a structural one.

The signs were always there.

He spent years building detailed worlds in Minecraft and Roblox, completely absorbed in how things came together. He understood, even then, the balance between vision and function. He could sit for hours watching YouTubers like Mark Rober, Practical Engineer, Real Engineering, and Smarter Every Day.

Looking back, it all lines up.

But what stands out most to me isn’t just his interest in engineering - it’s his work ethic. He’s driven, focused, and disciplined in a way that makes me confident that wherever he lands, he’s going to do great things.

And the more I’ve worked with architects and engineers over the years, the more I’ve come to appreciate that the best outcomes don’t come from one way of thinking.

They come from balance.

The strongest teams are the ones where big ideas are paired with practical execution. Where creativity is supported by discipline. Where vision and function push each other to be better.

So while I may naturally lean toward efficiency and results, I’ve learned to respect both sides.

And I’m excited to see where my son fits into that world - and what he builds next.

Friday, May 15, 2026

A Year of Grandparenting: Distance, Dreams, and Devotion

Last week my granddaughter turned 1. Where did the last year go?

I know I was a young mom, but I never expected to become a young grandparent as well. It’s strange and sometimes mentally hard. I always pictured myself as the fun grandparent—taking my grandkids on adventures, making crafts, and sharing laughter. But my granddaughter doesn’t live near me, and at times, I feel like I’m missing so much as she grows up. Life doesn’t slow down for anyone; I still have to work and carry significant responsibilities. I wish I could press pause and savor the little moments, but time just keeps slipping away.

Still, I am grateful for the good relationship I have with my children, and I hope to build just as strong a bond with my grandchildren—however many I may have someday. It’s true: we never stop worrying about our adult kids, and now that concern extends to their children. No one tells you how hard parenting is, or that grandparenting comes with its own set of challenges and joys.

As I reflect on this first year, I’m reminded how important it is to cherish the moments we do get, even if they’re brief or far apart. Distance may separate us, but love bridges the gap. I want my granddaughter to know, as she grows, that kindness matters, that curiosity leads to wisdom, and that love is the greatest gift of all.

So, here are some wishes for her—and for myself—as we continue this journey together:

  • Love generously: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” — 1 Peter 4:8
  • Practice kindness: Every act of compassion makes the world brighter.
  • Seek wisdom and wonder: “Wonder is the beginning of wisdom.” — Socrates
  • Be grateful for each day: The little things often become the big things.
  • Be brave and true: Courage will carry us through the unknown.

Maybe I won’t be able to do all the “fun grandparent” things I imagined, but I’ll do my best to stay connected and share whatever love, guidance, and support I can—no matter the miles between us. And I hope someday she’ll look back and know she was cherished every step of the way.

Friday, April 17, 2026

Mandatory Fun Day

I’ve worked for many different companies over the years, and I’ve experienced a wide range of workplace cultures and traditions. I feel grateful for many of the teams I’ve been part of, but I’ve also noticed how much companies struggle with one particular thing: employee engagement.

Some companies do nothing at all.
Some companies do a lot—sometimes almost too much.
And a few, in my opinion, strike the right balance of engagement, culture, and benefits.

But here’s what I believe is more important than any of that.

Most people today don’t celebrate unless their company prompts them to.

Think about how often managers take teams out to lunch—but only if it’s company-paid. My husband once had a manager who regularly treated his team to lunch out of his own pocket. That small difference made it feel genuine, personal, and intentional—not transactional.

When everything is paid for, planned, and expected, it creates a lack of emotional investment. People often don’t care more when they’re incentivized to care; they care when something actually means something.

I’ve also noticed a generational gap in expectations. Older generations often expected little from their employers, while younger generations tend to expect generosity, work-life balance, and workplace perks. In response, many companies now plan “mandatory fun days”—events designed to bring coworkers together and build culture.

Sometimes they work.
But more often, I believe they create experiences rather than real connections.

These events are planned.
They’re paid for.
And they’re expected.

That makes them feel anything but organic.

Worse, they sometimes send a subtle message: You don’t need to step up—because the company will handle it for you. Over time, that removes personal responsibility and intention from leadership and teams.

I don’t believe big events create better culture. If anything, the older I get, the more I realize that it’s the small, immaterial things that truly matter.

A thoughtful handwritten thank-you card—not one that’s templated or rubber-stamped.
An impromptu conversation.
A spontaneous lunch to celebrate something meaningful in someone’s life.

Recently, a new coworker said to me, “I only go out with people because it’s company-paid and I have to.” That comment made me genuinely sad. It showed a lack of appreciation and intention—two things I believe are essential to a healthy workplace.

If you’re a manager, learn how to show appreciation with intention.
Don’t create mandatory fun days just because you feel obligated to.
Create a simple philosophy around stewardship—of people and of company resources—especially if your organization doesn’t have deep pockets or large expense accounts.

Culture isn’t built through obligation.
It’s built through care.

Tuesday, January 27, 2026

I still haven’t found what I’m looking for

 When I was a teenager, I asked my youth pastor a serious question. I don’t remember the exact words—something like What’s the meaning of life? It was probably a clumsy, overly dramatic teenage question, but I remember his answer clearly.

He quoted U2: “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.”

At the time, I thought it was an odd response. He was mature, knew Jesus, and seemed to have a pretty great life. People liked him. He lived freely and appeared carefree.

And yet—here I am now, the same age he was when I asked that question, sometimes saying those exact words myself: I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.

I have a good life. A beautiful family—not perfect, but pretty amazing. A solid career. More than enough things. I take care of my mind, body, and soul as best I can. I’m self-aware… or at least I think I am.

What I’m beginning to understand is the quiet truth behind that U2 lyric: I’m not actually lost. I’m in between versions of myself.

That makes sense. I’m at a crossroads. My kids are adults now, and I’ve just welcomed a granddaughter into the world. Life has shifted.

What I wonder is this: Who is the next version of me?

I’m not looking for more things. I’m looking for more peace, love, and joy. I’ve climbed high mountains and wandered through wide fields—literally and metaphorically. I’ve searched. I’ve arrived. And I’ve started again.

So here I am, asking questions. Trying to reawaken parts of myself I didn’t know existed—or that may have been asleep for a while.

I think about my youth pastor now and realize how broken he probably was, too. And yet, he gave me real wisdom: to keep running when you’re tired and to keep searching when you feel lost—literally and metaphorically. (He was also known for taking long “shortcuts.”)

I’ve always believed that if something felt off in my life, it meant I needed fixing. But the truth is, I’m not broken—I’m evolving.  

I still haven’t found what I’m looking for—and maybe that’s exactly how I know I’m alive.

Thursday, November 13, 2025

World Kindness Day

Having grown up in Pittsburgh, PA, I was raised on Mr. Rogers! (He's a legend who encouraged kindness, self-worth, and compassion.)

This morning, as I was driving to work and mumbling at the cars cutting me off, I caught myself—and thought, “What would Mr. Rogers do?”

I took a breath, smiled, and decided to give them a little grace. We never really know what others are going through, but kindness is always a good place to start.

On this World Kindness Day, I’m reminding myself that small acts—whether it’s patience on the road, a smile to a coworker, or a word of encouragement—can make a big difference in someone’s neighborhood. 💛





Friday, August 15, 2025

My 40 major accomplishments - Reflections


In scripture the the number 40 generally symbolized a period of testing or trial.  Moses alone went though many rounds with the number 40.  40 years in Egypt to 40 more years in the desert and don't forget the 40 days on Mount Sinai twice. 

I have been wondering about the things I've really accomplished in my 40 years of life... here's what of my 40 most significant accomplishments:

1. My faith in Christ

2. Getting married 

3. Having a Daughter

4. Having a Son

5. My Time at Habitat for Humanity and knowing Millard Fuller

6. My Happy-Go-Lucky Attitude 

7. My college Education 

8. My Time at Wake Tech

9. My Time in Youth Ministry  as a youth group leader

10. Being a Seahorse

11.  Making a bucket list and checking a lot off it

12.  Coming up with goooooals to make myself a better person

13. Running a half marathon (..quite a few times)

14. Parallel parking in downtown Pittsburgh in the rain during rush hour

15. Raised money at age 17 to go on a habitat mission trip - 25th anniversary blitz build by myself

16. Taking My Daughter to Paris and London for her birthday

17. Running an 800M at 2:18 and a 400M at .58

18. Moving out at 18 and living independently since then

19. Being able to cook well and cooking for over 130 guests (twice)

20. Staying happily married more than 20 years .. and still going

21. Playing softball throughout high school and being part of the all Star playoff team each year

22. Being Artistic and painting my living room to look like a castle

23. Winning a hammer buy sinking a 16 penny nail with one hit

24. Being financially savvy and a natural entrepreneur.  Having started working at age 12 with delivering newspapers.

25. Working hard to be debt free

26.  Running a marathon (a few times actually)

27.  Learning how to drive a manual (stick shift) from PA to GA & a Motorcycle

28. Being anemic and learning you have to listen and take care of your body

29. Having both my children 100% naturally and impressing my nurses when they thought I couldn't do it

30.  Being part of the best high school youth group and knowing Jim and Bonnie

31. My time working in healthcare and helping people get better

32. Being a working mom

33. Planning family trips and showing my kids a little bit of the world

34.  My time in stage crew and theater arts and painting spectacular sets my senior year

35. Coming up with an idea

36. Taking My Son to Greece for his birthday

37. For having core values and trying to live them out every day

39. Knowing when to quit and when to keep going

40. Knowing that my best efforts and accomplishments are all the work of God




Wednesday, September 2, 2020

Embrace your Imperfections


Birthday's always inspire me to do something .. evaluate where I am and who I am. 

What I am finding out the older I get is the more I embrace my imperfections.  
We live in a world that is constantly telling us to be 'perfect'  I am too old to know that we are never going to be perfect and more importantly that the world just wants us to constantly question who we are.  

Heck - even our phones take out any flaws and make us look... way more spectacular that we really look:

"Face Beauty Auto"

"Real life me"

So today, I am turning off auto filter and letting you know some of my imperfections! 

1. I have no musical talent WHAT SO EVER … and when I sing along with the radio (which I do often and so much enjoy)  I am out of tune, the lyrics are half wrong, and even though I look like I might be the best headbanger in the world.. I am not.  

2. I worry way too much.  I worry about my family, my career, even my electric bill.. I worry when I shouldn't.  I worry so much at times - I don't sleep and then I worry about my health and well being.  I know that My faith tells me to not worry.. but then I worry I am living my faith all wrong.  

3.  I know I shouldn't care what people think of me... but I secretly do.  I guess we all want to be liked and one of the "cool popular" people.  We try way to hard to be the "perfect" friend or people pleaser.  I want to seem cool.. have cool hair... make cool things.  But I know deep down I am not cool 99.9% of the time. 

4. My body is far - far - far from perfect. I have gray hair.  I have crocked teeth.  I have scars.  I have acne.  I have wrinkles.  And I have stretch marks.  My ideal weight is off about 15 pounds and my cholesterol is starting to border on the higher side. My hair is frizzy all the time.  I don't get enough good sleep so I am starting to look like a raccoon at times.  I am never going to be a model and the true is I am short and somewhat stalky.  

5. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up.  I am constantly setting up some lofty goals because I am secretly trying to figure out my purpose in life.  What am I good at, What makes the world a little more better?  What am I doing with my life?  I feel like I am constantly challenging the status quo but stuck in the I must live the "Happy American Dream."  And yet, I am doing everything in my power to keep up with the 'Jones' and grow my 401K, so one day I can say: "I made it."  

            and that's only a few... so many more..

I believe, we all need to be a little more transparent instead of letting the "Face beauty auto" correct us.  The world tell us who we should be.  What we should look like.  How "Perfect" is suppose to look like.

We need to embrace those imperfections.  

Raising a daughter has taught me that it's ok to show your true self.  Lead by example and teach your daughters (and sons) that it's ok to be yourself and true to who you are. You shouldn't have to hide any imprecations because we all have them and they make use all unique. 

God made us all beautiful in our own ways and he loves us even in our imperfections.  

We all need to love ourselves for what we are instead of hating ourselves for what we're not. 

#embraceyourimperfections