Breaking up with my job

So I have been given a new opportunity and a new chapter in my book of life. I am super excited about all the things I know God is teaching me and the ways he's rewarding me... but now I have to break up with my old job.

After a decade of service ... It's been nothing short of a roller coaster of emotions over the past couple weeks. They say that quitting your job can be as heartbreaking as ending a romance and is that ever true.

I have fallen trapped into all the DON'TS. Don't hold a grudge... Don't annoy your co-workers... Don't act like a short-timer... My bad attitude over the past week and a half is not who I am and how I want to leave. I have so many great memories and I find it strange that I am only remembering the bad ones.

I kept saying I was just following the steps of grieving and I kind of got stuck in Anger. I am typically not an angry person. Or I always seem to be able to move on and let things go. Just because I am sad or just disappointed doesn't mean I am not going to leave. I am leaving. At this point, nothing good will come from my disappointment or lack of fulfillment I have started to feel. God is teaching me to end relationships well... not like a bad-romance breakup. I deserve more and I am more ...

So with only one more week ... five more days... I have decided to let it all go. I will be meditating these great quotes this week...

Comments

She's not 39... Anymore...

Over 20 years ago when I was in high school, my youth group leader Bonnie was turning 40. Jim (her husband) and I rewrote the lyrics to I can't cry anymore by Sheryl Crow and sang "She's not 39 anymore..." Funny how I somewhat forgot about that and now... Soon I'll be singing that myself. I don't quiet recall at the age of 16 where I wanted to be when I turned forty but I'm pretty sure I wanted to be much like Bonnie. She was a pretty epic person and considering I didn't deserve her love she gave it so freely. I've been reflecting alot on the person I was then and the person I am today. I'm amazed where and how I traveled and the journey in which God lead me. I often wondering, where did the days and years go? I'm not sure I really recall what my 16 year old self would be at at my 16 year would be at age 40. l daughter look a lot at my daughter and an reminded of the youthfulness and sence of adventure. Turin...

Twisted Motives

A few weeks ago, I had gotten an idea to paint a picture. I haven't painted anything in months, as I am not often motivated or inspired to do so. But one Saturday afternoon, I found some motivation. I started to paint a very colorful picture, that I started to really love how it was coming out. Most of the time I don't love my artwork, but find it to be rather nice/ tolerable. But this painting was a bit different. I really loved it and in that moment, I wanted to give it to a friend that was(is) going through a rough moment in life. I thought of her as I was paining it and I told my daughter I wanted to give it to her. She said "you should." I second guessed myself and was trying to talk myself out of giving it to her. I said, oh it would seem strange me giving her a painting. But the Holy Spirit prompted me and reassured that I should give it to her. That afternoon after the paint dried, I wrapped the painting...

Gesso

As an occasional painter, I've been known to take an old painting and paint over it. There's a product called white gesso and it's purpose is to prime a canvas for oil painting and pre-prime and old paintings to be used again. It hides all the color that is under it but it doesnt hide the texture or previous strokes. Often times in life we have to somewhat start all over again. Perhaps it's restarting after a bad relationship, or a medical procedure that had left you different than before, or a job or career that hasn't really fulfilled you. Most of the time we find ourselves wanting to cover up a major mistake. Sometimes we wish life had a gesso option. Something that could cover up everything that was there before. A new start... As for me, I know it's my sinful heart that longs for the whiteness and freshness of a new clean canvas. One thing that often gives me great comfort is... Jesus is my gesso. He paid for my sins and his life ma...

Random Thoughts of a Supersmock

Search This Blog