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Any way, shape or form

I don't have a crowd of followers or a fan fair.  Probably most of my friends don't read my blog or like many of my Facebook posts.   I am not popular or famous in any way, shape or form. 
I don't experience moments when I walk in the room and it is instantly lighten up.   People stop, turn, look, smile and a scene of joy enters.  Those moments never happen to me.  I am not anything special in any way, shape or form.

I don't do anything that is big and grand.  Anyone could do my job or live my life.  Nothing I do is extraordinary in any way, shape or form.
We remind ourselves that nothing is really special about us.  Plain Jane.  I especially tell myself how unexceptional I am but why is any of this important?

It's not because I have low self-esteem or lack some passion that burns in me.  I don't hate my life in the shadows.  I don't long to be recognized by those around me.  I don't seek fame, fortune, or glory in any way, shape or form.  

Don't get me wrong,  I absolutely love being a blessing to others.  Throwing a pot luck at work, or leaving notes for my friends.  I love bringing joy and happiness to others.   I smile thinking about being a blessings to others unknowingly.   I don't boast in my accomplishments and I certainly don't struggle with being fain or prideful.  

 I know I don't have any superhero gifts, like so many people do.  I wouldn't know what to do if someone need any kind of medical attention.  I don't have a head full of knowledgeable facts and figures.  I am no theologian, prophet, priest or king.  I don't have a heart burning to accomplish anything rather grand and glorious.  

 I look at some peoples lives and I see great wonderful things.  They are good people doing good for all humanity.  The are kind, gentle, and more humble than I could even imagine.  

 I don't really remember what I have set out to accomplish.  I don't really recall some of my lofty dreams, I once had as a young girl.  I at some point wanted to do great and wonderful things.  What has happened?

 I certainly don't want to look back at my life and say "what is it that I really did?"  "What marks/ legacy's have I left, if any on the world or in humanity?"  I don't in any shape or form, want to be famous.  I just don't want to be forgotten and more importantly I don't want God to look at me and tell me how much I missed in the process.   I don't want to regret all the things I missed by lurking in the shadows and being too afraid to stand out in the crowd.  

 ah, yes,  It's hard to believe as I once loved the spot light, I loved the crowds.  I loved being noticed.   But I do think at times, I have faded away.  

 Is it wrong to at times want to be remember like the greats and not so greats?  I  know I will never be as strong as Goliath, famous as Elvis Presley,  as noble Benjamin Franklin, or loving as Mother Teresa.  I don't doubt, that I will just be a name somewhere in a graveyard.  

 But my name is written somewhere even more awesome than googles "Most famous people in the world."  It's written in a book far better than anything my mind could created.  God notices me everyday even in the shadows even in my splendors and my failures.  He notices, when I doubt myself or even doubt his plan, his purpose and his love.  He loves me in our imperfections, in my boldness and in my humbleness.   He loves me in all ways, shapes of forms.  


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