Any way, shape or form

I don't have a crowd of followers or a fan fair.  Probably most of my friends don't read my blog or like many of my Facebook posts.   I am not popular or famous in any way, shape or form. 

I don't experience moments when I walk in the room and it is instantly lighten up.   People stop, turn, look, smile and a scene of joy enters.  Those moments never happen to me.  I am not anything special in any way, shape or form.

I don't do anything that is big and grand.  Anyone could do my job or live my life.  Nothing I do is extraordinary in any way, shape or form.

We remind ourselves that nothing is really special about us.  Plain Jane.  I especially tell myself how unexceptional I am but why is any of this important?

It's not because I have low self-esteem or lack some passion that burns in me.  I don't hate my life in the shadows.  I don't long to be recognized by those around me.  I don't seek fame, fortune, or glory in any way, shape or form.  

Don't get me wrong,  I absolutely love being a blessing to others.  Throwing a pot luck at work, or leaving notes for my friends.  I love bringing joy and happiness to others.   I smile thinking about being a blessings to others unknowingly.   I don't boast in my accomplishments and I certainly don't struggle with being fain or prideful.  

I know I don't have any superhero gifts, like so many people do.  I wouldn't know what to do if someone need any kind of medical attention.  I don't have a head full of knowledgeable facts and figures.  I am no theologian, prophet, priest or king.  I don't have a heart burning to accomplish anything rather grand and glorious.  

I look at some peoples lives and I see great wonderful things.  They are good people doing good for all humanity.  The are kind, gentle, and more humble than I could even imagine.  

I don't really remember what I have set out to accomplish.  I don't really recall some of my lofty dreams, I once had as a young girl.  I at some point wanted to do great and wonderful things.  What has happened?

I certainly don't want to look back at my life and say "what is it that I really did?"  "What marks/ legacy's have I left, if any on the world or in humanity?"  I don't in any shape or form, want to be famous.  I just don't want to be forgotten and more importantly I don't want God to look at me and tell me how much I missed in the process.   I don't want to regret all the things I missed by lurking in the shadows and being too afraid to stand out in the crowd.  

ah, yes,  It's hard to believe as I once loved the spot light, I loved the crowds.  I loved being noticed.   But I do think at times, I have faded away.  

Is it wrong to at times want to be remember like the greats and not so greats?  I  know I will never be as strong as Goliath, famous as Elvis Presley,  as noble Benjamin Franklin, or loving as Mother Teresa.  I don't doubt, that I will just be a name somewhere in a graveyard.  

But my name is written somewhere even more awesome than googles "Most famous people in the world."  It's written in a book far better than anything my mind could created.  God notices me everyday even in the shadows even in my splendors and my failures.  He notices, when I doubt myself or even doubt his plan, his purpose and his love.  He loves me in our imperfections, in my boldness and in my humbleness.   He loves me in all ways, shapes of forms.  

Start Counting...

Oh so often, I start to count all the things that go "wrong."  These range from I don't really like the hair cut or color, or the boy didn't place well at the pinewood derby as I thought he should,  or I am so tired today because I stayed up too late playing minecraft, or why don't my family members call me more often, or I am not getting a bigger tax refund than we normally do.  These are real life complaints I have actually said to myself in my head.

Too often,  I start comparing myself to all those around me. Such as my house isn't as nice as theirs, or my kids aren't perfect in some shape or way,  or even I wish I looked as nice and put together as she does.

Why do we do that?

Why can't we really look at the important things in life?

Why can't we instead count our blessings.
















I often forget how blessed I really am.

I live in a country that allows me many freedoms!
I have a God that loves me in-spite of my many flaws!
I have children that love life and don't seem to want more than I can provide them!
I have a really good marriage even despite my lack of nurturing at times!

Why do we often focus on the negatives than all the positives?
At times, I have to remind myself that we are at war with our sins and our sinful nature.  Satan wants us to count the bad and not the blessings!  God however reminds over and over again to come to him all that is weak and weary!  He gives us rest.  He reminds us how blessed we are not but guilt or shame but out of love and peace.

We need to change our mindsets and start counting the real things that make us who we are.
Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow!  

Head in the Game

There are days, many days to be honest, when I just don't have my 'head in the game.'  I find myself constantly distracted by the things around me, like the drama or enthrallments of some people’s lives.  Or even the materialistic things that hold my attention, but ultimately distract me from the more important things.  

Too often my head just isn’t in the game.  I show up but I have neither the heart nor passion to really play.  This happens at home, at work, at kids events, at church, and social events.  

I recently read Hebrews 12.  To writer sums up the chapter by remaindering of God’s ‘life race’ in which we are all called to run and how since God loves us so he disciplines us in order that we might become more like him. 

I can certainly relate much to a race, as I have been in many in my life.  But it this verse reminded me of my marathon which I ran several years back.  It was by far the hardest race I have ran to date.  I was battling with an unknown vitamin and iron deficiency, which I have struggled with even to this day.  I was tired.  I was worn.  I didn’t show up with my head in the game.  I finished but I remember the disappointment that all the others runners kept passing me and I kept slowing down.  But I finished and though I am proud that I did.  I remember wanting a do over.  I wanted a second chance to show the world that I was able to finish stronger, better, faster. 

It wasn’t until I read Hebrews 12 that I realized how often it is that I look around to the other racers and I compare myself to them.  I look around and see others that having more, nicer things, better looks, better salaries, bigger houses, more likes on facebook.  To be honest, at times it’s the whole reason I don’t have the heart or passion to show up some days.  Though, I know God doesn’t want us to compare ourselves to others, and yet we do it anyway.    

I imagine that the Olympics, Super Bowl, Stanley Cup or even World Series are very important games for athletes.  One of the most important they may ever be a part of.  I imagine if a team makes it to those, they really have to show up with their heads in the game.  As is life, It’s a pretty darn important race for us all. 

We get tired and we slow down at times.  Sometimes we even crawl or God drags us along.  It’s true.   But I know how much God is willing to give us, if we only ask him for it.  He will supply us with more than enough energy and strength to get our heads back in the game.  He went to the ends of the earth and gates of Hell for us once already. 

I know that most days I don’t feel as my race or game isn’t nearly as important as others, but that is simply just a lie and excuse I make up.   If you believe all the lies that are out there you will never finish the race and you will sit there without your head in the game.   

I have to constantly remind myself that my endurance, my speed and my strength don’t come directly from my abilities or true self.  Rather, those things are poured out by a loving father we never lacks wisdom, love or passion.  He gives us things in his timing and for our good, we just have to keep our eyes fixed on him, our legs ready for the run and our heads in the game, long enough for him to tell us we finished strong and he is proud of us.  Listen to him cheering you on because most days he is, we’re just too distracted to look and listen to him because we're too distracted by everyone else.  

Sad reality sometimes...

I just received an email this morning for our college professional development workshops.  Among the list of course offered some include:  

• Unlawful Harassment Prevention for Higher Education Staff
• Preventing Discrimination and Sexual Violence: Title IX and the SaVE Act for Faculty and Staff

and most terrifying ...

• Active Shooter Response for Higher Education

It's not uncommon to have classes such as these, but  I have been thinking much about the innocence lost and how the world is so very dark, cold and dangerous.  

We have to prepare ourselves for just about anything and the sad reality is at times our world is extremely dreadful.  

A few weeks ago, my daughter watched a show with my husband and I, which ended on a very twisted and dark resolution.  It wasn't the happy-go lucky ending we had thought it would be.  It left you feeling melancholy and somewhat icky.  It was a moment that I thought to myself, I can never take that back from her mind.  She can't "unknow" that those terrible things that really do happen in life.  She is a sweet young lady full of love and grace and that show was nothing of that.  We certainly would have never let her watch it had we known that the outcome was so grim.  

Yet, she now knows a little better that our world is full of sin and sinners.  

We live in such a sad reality here, where I have to sometimes wonder if a armed gunman would show up at my school and shot people.  It's happened all around the world, it could certainly happen here.

It's sad to think that innocent people are way too often exposed to harassment and abuse: physical, mental and even sexual.  It's even sad to think that we have to be taught how to recognize these things.  

Fact is our world/ our reality is many times dark, cold and dangerous.  

I can't imagine those people who have absolutely no hope in what is to come.  I know that all of these trials, tribulations and terror isn't the end of this story.  We have the hope of a savior.  Someday soon, he will rescue us from this dark pit of sin and sorrow. 

It's important to me, to know that and teach my children that even in the darkest hours, when all seems lost -- we have hope and can find joy in the arms of Jesus.    It's amazing how God reminds us of his grace.